#TodayIDidAThing

Today I did a thing

A thing I’ve played in my head for months

Today I did a thing

Just the thought of it

Kicked me more than once

Today I did a thing

To remove all the chains

Today I did a thing

Many people will find strange

Today I did a thing

Followed my heart without a doubt

Today I did a thing

It was something I thought I couldn’t live without

Today I did a thing

To close out a chapter

Today I did a thing

I welcome my happily ever after 💖

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#NoLongerASecret

Life has been “different” lately. Approximately two months ago I experienced a COMPLETE emotional breakdown🤯. I had to retreat from everything I loved (and thought) I loved. I even had to take a two week leave of absence from work🚶‍♀️. The whirlwind of emotions hit me HARD and UNEXPECTEDLY🌪. I felt like a COMPLETE wreck.

I can’t lie- I wanted to throw in the towel for so many reasons. I wasn’t suicidal; it was more like I was tired of being EVERYTHING- to EVERYONE, but myself. I was tired of placing myself last on the list for EVERYTHING! I believe I learned this at a young age. “Cater to everything for everyone”. “Earn your keep- even if it costs you your own peace”😏. I was taught that was the way of life. I wasn’t living a “fulfilling” life if I didn’t do all of the above🥺.

I’ve learned my breakdown was in fact a BREAKTHROUGH💖! My soul was breaking through while screaming… “Here I am… Please listen to me…Please get to know me… Please allow me to help you”. I didn’t quite understand it at the time. I just took it as I was crazy- because that’s what people will quickly tell you. It was at that point when I realized it WASN’T about people… it was about ME 😍.

I began to care less about what people thought of me. This was challenging as I had been a “people pleaser” my entire life. I started to think “What do I like”… more and more… “How does this make me feel”… more and more… I even found myself saying a few times… “screw who doesn’t like it 😂😩😎”. I was learning how to FEEL and SPEAK my truth. My truth was foreign to me for 35 LONG years.

I am finally learning to value me. It’s funny because I’ve always “underestimated” myself and my abilities. People would express that I am great at this or that, but I always took it as nothing special- I’m just like everyone else. I AM equal to everyone else; however, I have MANY MANY gifts and I am finally learning to embrace them.

I thought I was “weird” because I was “different”. That’s not true…My “different” are blessings and gifts in which I am truly grateful for. I have been receiving A LOT of recognition lately for these various gifts. I finally believe, feel, and know what I am truly capable of. I am aware of my positive impact on others. No longer do I “downplay” it. I welcome and embrace it all as I express gratitude 🤗.

All of this is to say- I’ve been through the storm OVER and OVER again. I’ve been overlooked and last OVER and OVER again… I’ve been used and abused (by self and others) OVER and OVER again. Those things NEVER defined me!!! They only built up my character for the consecutive wins on the ships that are arriving 🛳 (as I type). My future is extremely bright✨ You will read (and hear) all about it in due time.

Just remember- we will ALL reap the rewards of our blood, sweat, and tears… As long as our intentions are good and pure 💖. Just be patient and remember… We have worked way too hard just to be mediocre. Everything is working itself out behind the scenes. Things will be revealed in divine timing✨

#Serendipity

Let’s rewind to the end of May for a bit. I recall sharing with you all about an opportunity that I applied for “on a whim”. Follow up conversations had taken place regarding that opportunity and I received the green light from the other end. There were so many questions on my end… such as… How will I make this happen… Will it all really work in my favor… along with other questions and thoughts. Nevertheless, I agreed to the terms despite not knowing how things will transpire. My ego gets the best of me sometimes… and I talk myself out of it while thinking of all of the obstacles in the way. However, I pray over this daily… I ask the “higher ups” to show me signs this opportunity will work in my favor.

Fast forward to early July. I purchased a Groupon for an energy healing. The concept of this type of healing is to look beyond the body and focus on it’s energetic fields. This is the level where we hold our trauma, fears, and other intangible concepts- our subconscious. These concepts and feelings are what lead to physical and mental dis-ease in the body. I decided to invest in this service as I am working on bringing the subconscious to the conscious.

The session took place at the healer’s home. She was very welcoming and we briefly chatted about ourselves for a few minutes. Then, she requested that I close my eyes and imagine a “safe haven” where I felt enormous peace and satisfaction. I complied and this carried on for about a minute or two. She then requested that I slowly open my eyes and scan the room. This was a practice to allow me to be present- in my body… with my surroundings. I slowly opened my eyes and scanned the room on my right. Then, i scanned the room to my left…

I was sooo shocked by what I witnessed sitting on the table in front of me (to my left). It was a picture of the individual who is the “head” over the opportunity I applied for.

I immediately broke down in tears of joy… tears of happiness… tears of my cries and prayers were answered. The “higher ups” gave me ALL the confirmation I could have EVER needed. Here I was at a healing session with a person I had NEVER met. What are the chances of me seeing a picture of the “head” of the organization… That’s nothing but my God, angels, and spirit guides.

The takeaway here is “have faith”. Pray, Pray, and PRAY… They listen… They hear your cries… If it’s meant to be… They WILL deliver… Your every need will be met… and they are organizing things behind the scenes… Things you could never imagine… and the beauty is… They do it ALL JUST FOR YOU!!!

I will keep you guys posted as the wheels move forward 🙂

#MyStruggles

A little over a year ago I was faced with a challenging circumstance. I was LITERALLY ONE class away from obtaining my Master’s degree. The problem was- I had exhausted ALL of my financial aid (lessons learned). I was always the type to depend on financial aid to “finance” my education. Take it from me and learn from my mistakes-DON’T DO IT… Lol.

Anyway, obtaining my master’s degree was very trying for me. I took several breaks. I started in one state and re-located to another. That was a good year break as I transitioned to another school. My sibling was in a horrific car accident, which caused him to become a quadriplegic. Outside of the emotional impact- I literally traveled 5 hours nearly every other weekend for quite some time. Then, my mother passed away the following year unexpectedly. This took a toll on me and I decided to take off another semester. At the time- it seemed as though completing my degree was not an option.

I persevered through it and re-enrolled the following semester. My grades were “on point” despite “life” happening.

Again, I was literally one class away from graduating… it was DO or DIE. No financial aid left… I could afford it, but I did not want to spend it (that’s where my head was at the time… just being honest). I made the executive decision to pay for my class OUT OF POCKET. My tuition was $4,xxx.00… I was on a payment plan to pay it over the course of three months. Boy was that a ROUGH summer- Lol. I survived it though… And that made my graduation and degree all worth it. The fact that I made sacrifices to get what I want… and DESERVE! I worked HARD for that degree!!! That degree is symbolic for my determination, dedication, strength, courage, faith, and MUCH MORE.

I took this stroll down memory lane today as I am faced with another challenge. I have been given the opportunity to pursue something in which I am VERY passionate about. However, successful execution will require the BIGGEST sacrifices I have made in my life TO DATE. I’ve repeatedly toyed with the idea to take the easy route out and just chuck it up as a “missed opportunity”, but then I realized… That’s not even how I operate. It is yet that time again… to put that “Faith” and “Sacrifice” cape on and MAKE IT HAPPEN!!! I have stories for days to tell you how things have ALWAYS worked out in my favor. I’ve EARNED EVERYTHING I have… When the time comes…I will provide an update on how I (via my spirit team) will manifest this miracle and enjoy the fruits of my LABOR!

I’ll leave you with this…