#MeNoChaser

If you knew where I started… Then you’d understand why I feel so passionate about the changes I am making in my life. It all started with a troubled childhood. A childhood that taught me enormous strength and power- like I could NEVER imagine. I was blinded by the wounds as I aged into adulthood. It was all suppressed- deeper than DEEP. Over time- I was forced to deal with the demons in my closet… The demons behind my smile… The demons that plagued me AND my life. I had to get vulnerable and truthful with ME… I couldn’t blame any ONE or THING. I played that game for sooo long. It was truly played OUT.

This inner-work journey began a little over two years ago. Little by little- I began to chisel away. None of it really made sense to me back then. I just knew I was uncomfortable in many situations. I knew I kept running into the same problems- often different people… sometimes the SAME people. Either way- I realized… “It can’t be EVERYONE else”- Lol. This acknowledgement occurred over time because when I first started- I still blamed everything and everyone else- Lol… just being honest. I dibbled and dabbled with… what’s right… and what’s COMFORTABLE… Over time… that thought process changed. I began to understand karma… and the consequences of my actions… I learned… If I give into my selfish and egotistical ways… NOTHING good can come of it! I had to do something different… if I wanted DIFFERENT.

Over time… I began to delve deep. What is me? What am I creating in my life? How am I attracting circumstances that are not aligned with my greatest good? What examples am I setting for those who look up to me? What generational curses am I “accepting” as MY fate? When I tell you… this was far from easy… I wholeheartedly mean… FAR FROM EASY! Either way… I faced those demons… and held myself ACCOUNTABLE! Trust and believe- this is the BEST thing you can do for your own development and progression in life. It is not easy, but it is truly WORTH IT… EVERY BIT!

I still continue to delve deep as this healing journey is a never-ending process. Many ups… many downs… Many victories… many lessons… many BLESSINGS… especially in hindsight- Lol. In the present moment- I am focusing on learning me… WHO I AM… not who I was…. not who I PRETENDED to be- just to be “accepted”. Not who everyone THINKS I am… None of that served me!!! I realize I came here for a DIVINE purpose… ONLY I can fulfill that destiny!!! I am on path to live out this vision that I co-created with the DIVINE for MY life…

To be honest- I don’t understand A LOT of it… I have lots of questions… FREQUENTLY… BUT… I am learning to “flow with the go”… It is a constant struggle!!! The good part- I would not have thought to “flow with the go” two years ago… because I was standing in my own way… with thoughts that I was “handling my business”- Lollol… at the thought of it… I had NO IDEA… Either way… I am SOOO glad and PROUD…. that I’ve experienced all that I have… So I can be EXACTLY where I am now… TODAY… with a VISION… with a PURPOSE…. and FAITH….. and to BE ME… to STAND IN MY TRUTH!!! Regardless of what that may look like to others… One day… I will look back and share my testimony… Then maybe people will understand… The vision I had/have… Hopefully it will inspire others to follow their hearts… If one is inspired… I’ve accomplished MY mission- Plus one 🙂

Thanks for taking a glimpse into the side that I RARELY show 🙂

#BeBravePodcast

Cosmic Energies: Be Brave: Episode 5

Here’s a podcast my wife and I uploaded over the summer. Hope it inspires you 🙂

#TheUnknown

Just a quick post-

I’ve found myself saying “I don’t know” a lot lately. I’m at the point where I even give a slight smirk as I say it. I guess that means I am getting more and more comfortable with saying it- Lol. I struggle daily with “allow things to work out as it needs to” and “FIGURE IT OUT NOOWWWW”!!!! Lololol- NO LIES. Somehow, the thought of “I’m still here” keeps me going. Somehow… the thought of looking back at the “inner work” I’ve been doing lately… was NOT in vain. Sidenote- it’s funny that I am listening to a song right now with the lyrics- “I release control… And surrender to the flow… Of love… That will heal me” by Alexa Sunshine Rose. Funny how the universe works. I guess that means… Stop stressing and CONTINUE to allow the universe to work FOR me.

To be continued…

#IAm

#ManyDeaths

So many days

So many nights

Lost & Confused

A bruise

And a wound

Over again

My head & heart

Would spin

Death after death

My illusions

My thoughts

The confusion

Made me distraught

UN-learn who I was

Forget the “just because”

Learn who I am

I know I CAN

Find the light within

Through the darkness

The depression

The “fitting in”

This is where it begins

Many deaths

To be born again

#MyWords

Not to “toot” my own horn

But… I’ll gladly “toot” it😎

The universe is allowing me

To see

How amazingly powerful

My words truly are

Especially when I pull them

From the core of my heart

When I say & write

Exactly what it is

That I feel

Deep within

I am often reminded

“I said that”

“I wrote that”

“I thought that”

“I MANIFESTED that”

Too often

We fail to trust ourselves

Our capabilities

I am super grateful

For the reminders

From time to time

Case & Point

9 weeks ago

I commented on someone’s post

I said

“I have a dream to ________

One day”

When I tell you

That exact dream is manifesting

As I type

Beyond my wildest dreams

My passion

My determination

My soul tribe’s

Love…guidance…

Peace & protection ✨

Here’s to breaking

Generational curses

Here’s to instilling

Generational BLESSINGS 💖

#InBetween

The “in between” can be so tricky

It’s that space where

You are not where you were

But also not where you’re going

You look back

And see how far you’ve come

You see all that you’ve changed

All that you’ve released

All that you’ve gained

All that you’ve embraced

All that you’ve created

When you never imagined

You’d accomplish so much

So why the sense of “failure”

I guess it’s all a part of life

Maybe because I know

There’s so much more potential inside of me

Potential to be greater

To be smarter

To be kinder

To be happy

To be true to me

To be proud

To be purposeful

To be all that my heart and soul desires

My vision

Until then

The “in between” can be so tricky